Talent in a Previous Life

Because It's Never Just About the Music

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Live Earth: Live - Hour Seven: 20:28PM 

Ricky Gervais is on stage to introduce Rob Reiner - in his Marti DiBerg guise - who is there to introduce Spinal Tap who are there to, well, we're not quite sure really. Spinal Tap is genuinely an ace movie, but it works because it's played entirely straight. In a live environment, however, there's a tendency towards painting with broad strokes, to signpost the jokes and generally miss the point of what made the whole thing successful in the first place, and so it was with the Tap's reunion. Opening with Stonehenge, along with a rehash of the Stonehenge joke from the film which didn't really work, although it's always nice to see dwarves dancing, we then got a new song, Warmer Than Hell, written specially for the show, which didn't really work, before then, presumably, going on to Big Bottom, with virtually all the bass players who could be found backstage. This may or may not have worked, we may never know as the BBC decided to cut away at this point to show Rhianna in Tokyo not, as you might expect, doing Umbrella, promoting the de rigour tool should the weather continue to go tits up , but doing SOS which does, at least, fit in with the slogan. Now, much as we love Rhianna, and we do, we don't quite see the point in cutting from something live to something which was recorded hours ago and could be shown at any point in the evening. But what do we know? We don't work in television, something which is surely television's loss. Or is it their gain? Probably the latter, come to think of it.

And so, because they've asked him and he's got to appear somewhere and all the jobs selling t-shirts have already been taken, James Blunt is, alas, next, although we do have one - one! - good thing to say about his set. It's been a while, thankfully, since we've seen him, but he's been spending his time constructively, stockpiling enough testosterone to grow a halfway passable beard. Bless. He opens with Wise Men while owls appear on the backdrop - do you see what they've done there? - followed by Wild World. This was a somewhat odd choice of song for him to cover, given that even going to a Spongebob Squarepants theme park would be putting him outside his comfort zone. Wild for James is putting in the milk before the water. He does look absolutely terrified as he performs this song, perhaps because he's aware that every minute he spends in the public eye puts him one step closer to that beating he fully deserves. He closes with Same Mistake, but given that his mistake is 'being' James Blunt, it's one he can't help but keep making. And the good thing? He didn't do You're Beautiful, so we guess we should be vaguely grateful.

KT Tunstall turns up doing The Other Side of the World which, coincidentally enough, is exactly where we want her to be. Preferably in the watery part. She's also wearing a gold catsuit under her shorts and t-shirt, a bit like CSS' Lovefoxxx. Only rubbish. And entirely lacking sex appeal.

CURRENT CARBON FOOTPRINT: Godzilla angrily stomping down on his foot after the humans foolish attempt to bring an end to his reign of terror using nothing more than conventional weapons..

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