Talent in a Previous Life

Because It's Never Just About the Music

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

10 Things We State About... 

See, told you we'd do this. Lily Allen is still at number one with Smile, so here are ten entirely true and in no way made up facts about Happiness. Sorry.
  1. Cutting edge, alternative, and highly relevant to our average reader comedian Ken Dodd reckons that happiness is the greatest gift that he possesses. He must have had some shit Christmasses
  2. Thom Yorke is told on at least 17 occasions every day to "cheer up", on the basis that "It might never happen".
  3. The Supernaturals, whose Smile could recently be heard soundtracking the adverts for the bank of the same name, were so irritatingly cheery that it would take them being locked in a room for over 14 hours during which they'd be constantly subjected to a variety of painful torture techniques, beatings and general unpleasantness before they'd even begin to look miserable. Uh, apparently.
  4. Ace of Base's Happy Nation was written about Belgium.
  5. In 1999 Gay Dad were looking for some Joy!. Nowadays they'll settle for someone who vaguely remembers who they were. Or 10p for a cup of tea.
  6. The Happy Mondays achieved all their start of the week based euphoria via a mix of positive thinking, breathing exercises and tai chi and not through the use in any way of mind bending narcotics.
  7. David Bowie is happy. He hopes you're happy too.
  8. Chico, apparently the happiest man in the world of pop, goes home every night and cries himself to sleep, exactly mirroring the actions of those who hear his records.
  9. Smile and the world smiles with you, but sing along to a Rooster record and you sing along alone.
  10. It uses more muscles to frown than to smile. The Sugababes have the most highly developed mouths in pop.