Monday, March 13, 2006
It's Monday! And available today in all good record shops is Girls Aloud's new single Whole Lotta History. Yes, we know it's not Models which everyone knows should have been the next single, and yes, we know it's a pop ballad so not exactly a path we like seeing the Girls go down, but the B-side does feature their Nicola starring cover of Teenage Dirtbag which is, lest we forget, one of the greatest moments in live music, ever, so it's worth buying for that. Later this week we'll be bringing you full details of the forthcoming Girls Aloud School, soon to be opening under the City Acadamies scheme, and an exclusive preview of Dannii Minogue's children's book, but before all that, let's see what we learnt from this week's Top of the Pops:-
- Fearne was away this week, presumably still recovering from having to work alongside Chico on Top of the Pops: Reloaded, so Reggie Yates took on main presenting duties. He was joined by a living car crash in the form of Cyndi Lauper, who just wanted to have fun, be entirely random, and spend most of the show looking off camera, searching for a reason why she was there.
- The endorphin rush of sassy joy which is Sugababes' Red Dress only got to number three, which is as disappointing as opening a box of Crunchy Nut Cornflakes to find only regular cornflakes inside. Cooler than a red dress they may be, but it seems they're not as popular with the single buying public as the credless Chico.
- According to Cyndi, the Zutones were up next. Abi Harding, as we've said before, still has the best legs in pop. Annoyingly, despite having dismissed The Zutons as a bunch of irritating Scousers with all the musical talent of Stan Boardman, we do quite like the new single, Why Won't You Give Me Your Love. We think, however, that it's only because the West Side Story aping video is quite good and they've tricked us.
- It's a testament to the dullness of Corrine Bailey Rae, number 5 in the charts with Put Your Records On, that the most interesting fact the TotP researchers could find to flash up during her performance was that she's been married to her husband for four years and they're looking forward to buying their first house together.
- Placebo are back! And if you're wondering what new single Because I Want You sounds like then just imagine any other Placebo song you've heard, as it basically sounds a bit like that.
- Only not as good.
- RETRO: Vanilla Ice doing Ice Ice Baby. Vanilla was rocking the rarely seen 'Hair as Hat' look.
- The Fallen, Franz Ferdinand's new single, was written after lead singer Nicky Campbell dealt with a case involving old people, broken hips, spillages and supermarkets on the last series of Watchdog, the popular consumer rights show.
- On the downside Fucking Chico is still number one. But on the upside, it's not Fucking Orson.