Thursday, February 02, 2006
Worst Things Worst
It's here! Yes, only one month after it was supposed to start - it turns out that drawing up a list like this is a lot harder than you might expect - we can finally begin counting down our list of the 100 Actual Worst Records, Ever. Over the next 100 days (Ish. We're sure you're as aware as we are of the unlikelyhood of us being able to consistently update the site for a week, let alone 3 months) we'll be looking at each one of the godawful songs that make up this list, in a method which we believe is known as "milking it for all it's worth".As you may have noticed it's taken us a while to draw up this list, mainly because choosing which songs to leave out is harder than decided those to include. Indeed, there's probably a few surprises included in the artists that haven't made it into the list as well as those that have, but when even Ronan Keating and Jamiroquai find themselves lurking with intent outside the top 100, you can rest assured that everyone else in the list must be truely awful. To give an idea of just how strict we've been, not even Michael Bolton's Can I Touch You... There made the final cut.
Those rules again:-
- All songs must have charted in the UK top 40. Which has saved a large number of indie bands for whom reaching 57 counts as a success from the ignomy of featuring in the list.
- Only one entry per artist, otherwise we'd end up writing about the Stereophonics every other week.
- By "Ever" we essentially mean "Songs we remember and have heard of". This means that, despite their clear unlistenableness, bands such as Korn and Slipknot will not be appearing. We have no idea whether Spit it Out is a worse song than Vermillion, and we like our ears too much to do the research required.
- No novelty songs. While they're undoubtedly bad, they don't really claim to be anything else, and rarely does someone buy something like Afroman expecting to get an enjoyable musical experience out of it, they're just wanting to demonstrate to the world that they're twats without a sense of humour. So with that in mind, the Crazy Frog, Fast Food Rockers, Ocean Colour Scene and other similar joke bands will not be making an appearence.
- This list has been compiled by ourselves along with suggestions from readers - and thanks to all those who submitted their choices. What this basically means is that for all our claims to be striking a blow against musical snobbery, our list is just as biased and blinkered as other similar list. It just so happens that our bias happens to be one we agree with, thus making it better.
100: Thunderbugs - Friends Forever
99: England United - (How Does it Feel To Be) On Top of the World
98: Kula Shaker - Mystical Machine Gun
97: Deep Blue Something - Breakfast at Tiffanys
96: Hoobastank - The Reason
95: Geri Halliwell - It's Raining Men
94: Puddle of Mudd - Blurry
93: Usher - Confessions: Part 2
92: Speedway - Genie in a Bottle
91: Phantom Planet - California
90: Various Artists - Perfect Day
89: Blue - Fly By
88: Heather Small - Proud
87: Rooster - You're So Right For Me
86: ...
85: ..
84: .
music 100 worst records 100 worst songs
