Talent in a Previous Life

Because It's Never Just About the Music

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Frost Report: Day 10 

Hooray! Jenny Frost actually got to do something notable in I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here today! After a week and a half of sitting around, looking at her nails and wondering whether any new flavours of Pringles had come on to the market since she'd been away from civiliazation, she was finally picked to do a Bushtucker Trial, one going by the name of Panic Station. Unfortunately for us, if not for her, it turned out to be one of the dullest non-events in the show's history.

As she walked down towards the trial clearing, she confided that she was nervous, particularly because in previous trials she had lent an angel to the other girls for luck, but now it was time for her own piece of the action the thing had gone missing. Not to worry though, as she had an angel tatooed on her foot, which was apparently an adequate substitute. Hopefully in the future she will cut off her foot to alllow others to carry it and share in her good fortune, though given that no matter how you look at it, she's still Jenny Frost from Atomic Kitten, and that can hardly be considered to be fortunate.

After telling us that she was "Scared of everything, it's official", and less convincingly declaring that she loved all animals, she arrived to meet Ant and Dec. "How are you?", they asked, "Smelly, I think", replied our classy heroine. Dec, a braver man than us, took a sniff of her. "Yeah, you are", he confirmed. He then asked her what was going through her head, not a wise question really, unless you want to hear the answer "The wind".

The trial itself was essentially a more bug-ridden version of a Krypton Factor puzzle, involving using differently sized discs to block up various holes, out of which poured various nasty creatures, even if the nastiest thing in there was the girl attempting to solve this conundrum. In a vague bid to add some tension to this, the ceiling moved up and down, but at least Jenny didn't have to worry about suffering any damage should she bang her head against it. Despite a somewhat stumbling start where she failed the simple task of successfully picking up her first disc, Jenny did excellently, putting her head down, getting on with it, and generally treating the whole experience like something unpleasant that she had to be getting on with if she wanted to get her money, much like how she treated recording the vocals for Atomic Kitten's last album. In the end she got all nine stars and was very pleased with herself, "That calls for a gear stick maneouvre!", she exclaimed after leaving the booth, before performing a bizzarre set of moves that can only lead us to conclude that her car, whatever make or model it might be, is broken.

Having now had some experience dealing with strange, weird looking creatures, Jenny decided to continue with that theme by helping Evil Jimmy Osmond build a snowman. The fact that they were in the middle of a rainforest in the middle of summer was not seen as a drawback to them, as they decided to make the snowman out of rocks instead. It was named "Rocky the Snowman", a simple enough name you would have thought, but that didn't stop Miss Frost coming into the Bush Telegraph to explain to us why it was called Rocky, rather than the more traditional 'Frosty': "We can't call him Frosty coz someone might say Frosty and we wouldn't know if they were talking to me or the snowman, or vice versa". We don't think there'd have been any confusion ourselves, if anyone was talking to Frosty, they'd obviously be going for the one most likely to hold an intelligent conversation, so Jen should just assume they're chatting to the pile of rocks.

Earlier in the day Sid 'Sid' Owen picked Antony and Jenny to be the camp entertainers as he thought they were "The singers". Bless. This eventually culminated in the pair of them acting out David 'Cuprinol Man' Dickinson refusing to be Jimmy's deputy. Jenny played the role of David, presumably because it was the more masculine of the two roles. Her acting ability is akin to that of her singing.

Against both the odds and general common sense, Jenny Frost is remarkably still in the jungle. If you wish to maintain this state of affairs either dial 09011 32 32 04 or text JENNY to 63334.