Saturday, September 04, 2004
We Got Our Pop TV
So, the evening of 'musical' 'entertainment' is over and we're sure you're dying to know what we thought. Even if you're not, we're going to tell you anyway. First up was X Factor which paraded the expected assortment of tone deaf freaks and some half decent singers for our amusement. We've yet to pick our favourite, mainly because we've not seen anyone we actually fancy yet, but the highlight was undoubtedly G4 - the classical singers who did Bohemian Rhapsody. They were ridiculously good, even if the whiff of novelty did waft from them like the smell of tuna fish from a kitty cat. We're not entirely sure if they're the same thing as Simon Cowell's opera band project, Il Divo, or whether they're simply the inspiration for it. Either way we're slightly more excited by the project than we originally were.
Next up was BBC 1's Test The Nation: The Popular Music Test. We managed to score 60 out of 70, or 86% which, according to the BBC's slightly dubious scoretable, makes us a musical genius. This now presumably means that our opinions are definitively facts now, and anything we say has extra weight as a result of this. With that in mind, we'd like to state that the programme itself was absolutely shite and was one of the more boring periods we've spent in front of our TV set, and we used to watch the live coverage of sleep deprivation game show Shattered so we know what we're talking about. As well as featuring a group of celebrities, many of whom we had never seen until tonight, it also featured members of the public grouped according to various professions which, for all the relevance that they had to the world of pop music, were presumably picked by a producer standing outside television centre who accosted the first 7 people he found and asked them what they did for a living. The show also broadcast one of the most upsetting moments we've ever seen on UK television. No, not Anne Robinson's cleavage, that was simply disturbing, but it was the sight of Lauren Laverne looking embarrassed as they played a short clip of Kenickie performing the girl-guitar-pop fabulous single In Your Car. Quite why she's ashamed of having been part of one of the best pop bands of all time is a mystery to us. Surely if she's looking for something to be ashamed of she'd be better off looking at the heavily tippexed portion of her CV where her co-hosting of Channel 4's Let's-Laugh-At-Foreigners TV show Loves Like a Dog used to be displayed.
Next up was BBC 1's Test The Nation: The Popular Music Test. We managed to score 60 out of 70, or 86% which, according to the BBC's slightly dubious scoretable, makes us a musical genius. This now presumably means that our opinions are definitively facts now, and anything we say has extra weight as a result of this. With that in mind, we'd like to state that the programme itself was absolutely shite and was one of the more boring periods we've spent in front of our TV set, and we used to watch the live coverage of sleep deprivation game show Shattered so we know what we're talking about. As well as featuring a group of celebrities, many of whom we had never seen until tonight, it also featured members of the public grouped according to various professions which, for all the relevance that they had to the world of pop music, were presumably picked by a producer standing outside television centre who accosted the first 7 people he found and asked them what they did for a living. The show also broadcast one of the most upsetting moments we've ever seen on UK television. No, not Anne Robinson's cleavage, that was simply disturbing, but it was the sight of Lauren Laverne looking embarrassed as they played a short clip of Kenickie performing the girl-guitar-pop fabulous single In Your Car. Quite why she's ashamed of having been part of one of the best pop bands of all time is a mystery to us. Surely if she's looking for something to be ashamed of she'd be better off looking at the heavily tippexed portion of her CV where her co-hosting of Channel 4's Let's-Laugh-At-Foreigners TV show Loves Like a Dog used to be displayed.
