Saturday, August 09, 2003
Grin When You're Dissing
Ooh look. This post isn’t about the Fringe, but it is about another of TiaPL’s obsessions, which is the general rubbishness of Robbie Williams. In is his latest ironically titled single, Something Beautiful he declares that “If you’re lost, hurt, tired and lonely, something beautiful will come your way.”. This is quite clearly nonsense. If you are lost, hurt, tired and lonely, you are most likely a mountain climber who has fallen off a rockface and is currently lying in a twisted state in some secluded valley, no doubt showing the initial symptoms of hypothermia. At best, mountain rescue may come your way, and, as most Mountain Rescue types are bearded wearing bright orange kagouls, you would seriously be stretching the term to call them something beautiful, no matter how relieved you would be to see them.
However, this is only at best. What is far more likely to happen is that you will suffer a slow, miserable and painful descent into panic induced madness, followed by a death, leaving your corpse to be discovered displaying a frozen look of pain upon it’s features. Again, not exactly the dictionary definition of ‘something beautiful’. These are the facts Robbie, no matter how many cymbal crashes you use to represent punctuation marks.
However, this is only at best. What is far more likely to happen is that you will suffer a slow, miserable and painful descent into panic induced madness, followed by a death, leaving your corpse to be discovered displaying a frozen look of pain upon it’s features. Again, not exactly the dictionary definition of ‘something beautiful’. These are the facts Robbie, no matter how many cymbal crashes you use to represent punctuation marks.